Saturday, May 21, 2011

Breaking: Update On The Status Of The Rapture...


My sources tell me that Comet Elenin is arriving later than expected and therefore the fleet of UFOs that follow are late.

Those who have been chosen for the "Rapture" must have patience, my source states with confidence.

My sources say that Comet Elenin is sure to be due possibly tomorrow or the next day.  You can count on that as much as you can count on the Rapture and Harold Camping.

When Comet Elenin swings by Earth, the tail, which is filled with a fleet of amazing and intelligently flown UFOs will be extremely bright.  The brightness will surpass the brightness of the sun.  No, there will be no need to apply more sunscreen, my source assures.  Just be sure that you are wearing sunglasses all day and that you have them at your bedside by night while you are awaiting the big event, as optical damage can occur for those not prepared.

My sources tell me that those who have been receiving the government frequencies preparing them for the "Rapture" will need to be prepared to be "elevated" (abducted) with one small suitcase that should include: one change of clothing (including a clean pair of underwear), one small (4 x 6) memory book from Earth to share once they reach the new land (planet), some shoes and socks, and a hat.

Don't be alarmed if Comet Elenin is late by a couple of days.  Surely the plan is still in place for those who believe to be taken and elevated, leaving the rest of the human race to live out their redundant lives on an Earth that will implode into itself in October 2011.

If you are reading this and are not one of the chosen for the Rapture, don't fear, don't be sad, don't change a thing except improving the enjoyment of your living.  We humans that have not been chosen to procreate with the others on another planet will not actually notice a thing.  This is because of the programming that the government has done with the frequency mechanism that my source has not been able to disclose, only allowing those who are chosen to know our fate.

I can assure you who have not been chosen that you will not notice any difference, just as I can assure you that the impending rapture is real.

Story by:  Natasha Call

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